Help!

I have come to a startling discovery:

Patrick and I are terrible at naming toys.  Like, ridiculously awful.  It's a miracle that Miles wound up with a decent name.  Let me give you some examples:

This:

is Bear.  This:

 is Horse.  And this:

is Pillow Pet.

We have two teddy bears named Bear, two dinosaurs named Dinosaur, two dolls named Baby, and assorted Duck, Whales, and so on.

We really suck at this whole toy-naming thing.

Rock!

As I have mentioned on a few occasions, Miles seems to be in love with all animals, wherever he encounters them.  Whether it's the neighbor's dog, our cat deigning to come upstairs for a few moments, or the goats at the children's farm, Miles has a deep love for all creatures.

And, as you can imagine, this love is not limited to living creatures, but also extends to stuffed animals and the like.  One of his favorites is the rocking horse he got from his grandfather for Christmas.  He loves to rock on it, shouting "Rock!" at the top of his lungs over and over again.

Yesterday afternoon, I turned on the television for a few minutes' reprieve.  I had intended to turn to Qubo, but the reception was horrific, and thus, nothing would come on.  So, I was flipping channels, trying to find anything else to entertain him for a few moments.  I stopped on each channel, only to have him shake his head and say, "uh-uh", time after time.  Until I got to PBS, and a documentary about wild horses in the Rockies.  He stared, enthralled, for a few seconds, then whispered in awe, "Rock."

We watched that documentary for a full thirty minutes before I finally turned it off. :)

Tuuuuck.

So, yesterday, Miles and I went to Target to pick out a birthday present for Daddy from Miles.  Given Miles' complete hatred of most shopping excursions, I have to admit that I was expecting the worst.  I had no idea what I was in for.

We were without a cart.  For some reason, Miles has decided that the primary use of a shopping cart is to dive out of it.  Several times, I have managed to somehow catch my son mere seconds before he crashes into the floor.  Somehow, motherhood has turned me into some sort of disaster-sensing ninja with lightning-fast reflexes.  Highly useful, considering my child seems determined to bash his head on . . . well, any and every hard surface in sight.  In any case, I've found that, as long as we're not in a hurry to get anywhere particular, it's highly preferable to just allow Miles to walk.

There we were, meandering through the store, just the two of us: Miles darting off to look at the wall of TV's or display robot in the toy section, Mommy trying desperately to keep him from pulling all of the nicely-folded polos off of the racks.  Still, for the most part, it was a far calmer excursion than most.

Eventually, we had our items, and began making our way toward the checkout.  Halfway to the front of the store, Miles suddenly veered off into the women's clothing.  As soon as his feet touched carpet, though, he carefully laid down, then rolled over.  He flung a hand dramatically over his head, and said,

"I tuck."

For a moment, all I could do was stare at him with an open mouth, thinking,  "Wha. . .?!?!?"  Laughter bubbled up and out, before I could stop it.  After a few seconds, I managed to ask, "You're what?"

"I tuuuuck," he repeated, drawing it out for maximum theatrical effect.

"You're stuck?" I guessed.

"Ess. I tuuuuuuuuuuuck."

I leaned over, and tried to pick him up.  Toddlers have this neat trick where they turn into really heavy, but really limp spaghetti; he did that, all the while pointing down, shaking his head, saying, "Uh uh! Uh uh!"  I put him back down.  He carefully, but dramatically, threw himself back to the floor.

"I tuck."

Not knowing what else to do, I walked a few steps away, out of his eyesight, but where I could still see his shoes.  Sure enough, he caught up to me a few seconds later, chattering on as though nothing had happened.  Twenty steps later, he fell to the floor again, this time in the middle of the main aisle.

"I tuck."

It took half an hour to travel the fifty feet or so to the registers.  I couldn't help but laugh.

I Could Get Used to This . . .

Miles has always had a special love of the vacuum, which he calls the "Vrrrrrrrrrrrrrr."*  Usually, that means that he spends a ton of time chasing me around the room while I try desperately to sweep up the cereal crumbs.  After literally months of this, Patrick and I broke down and bought him his very own vacuum.

So far, he loves it.  And so do I.  He can now sweep up his own messes.  And he does.  And it is bliss.  The end.

Wait.  What do you mean he spends most of his time chasing the dog with it?  And the dog?  He barks at it.  Loudly

Oh, well, he's vacuuming.  Yeah, I could definitely get used to this. :)

* Add about 30 more seconds worth of "rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr" after that, and that is close to what Miles calls the vacuum.

Like Father . . .

Like son.

Miles has a new fascination: the computer.

The best thing about having a mommy who is a teacher is that she is always finding new ideas for me to entertain Miles.  Over Thanksgiving, she introduced me to an awesome  website she found: Fisher-Price's Online Learning Games.  It has games like Peek-a-boo for infants and toddlers.  The beginner games only require that he push the keys - any keys, in any order.  Each key press results in something happening on the screen, which makes him giggle.  He can sit there and play for several minutes at a time, and he's learning to be gentle with it.  When he gets excited, he tends to bang on things, but he is discovering that when he does that with the computer, it gets taken away.  It's teaching him self-control, and cause-and-effect.

And it's adorable to watch him sitting at a tiny laptop - it's just his size.

Yes, I am a Bad Mommy.  My son is 14 months old, and I am already encouraging him to play video games. Next week, we'll move on to other dangerous activities, like watching TV and climbing on tables.

Oh, wait . . .

:P

Miles has discovered a fun new toy.

What's more, he's discovered that everyone has one.

He loves to crawl up in my lap and stick his tongue out at me. Of course, that's my cue to stick my tongue back out at him. We go back and forth, sticking out our tongues at one another until, finally, I decide to mess with my kid.

So, I roll my tongue. And he just stares. And tries to copy it.

And for twenty minutes, we laugh like idiots over our wonderful tongues. And I wouldn't trade it for the world.

Meet Daphne

I have a new friend that I think you all need to meet. World, meet Daphne...

Yes, Daphne, my brand-new (refurbished) Notebook computer. Yep. This thing is the size, shape, and weight of a decent hardback book, with all the functionality of a basic laptop.*

Daphne is the newest member of our computer family. Way back when Patrick was naming his desktop computer**, he chose the name Aggamemnon, mainly because he liked the sound of it. Then, a few years later, he acquired a laptop. He chose to name it "Odysseus," to go with the theme. My laptop was then dubbed "Penelope," because in The Odyssey, Penelope is Odysseus' wife. Patrick's smart phone became "Telemachas," their son. My smart phone became "Calypso," the nymph who detained Odysseus for several years.***

Daphne, a sister nymph, just seemed like an appropriate name for my little roving distraction.

Not that you cared to know all of that, but it's my blog, so I'll say whatever I want, and you'll keep reading on the off chance that a picture of Miles shows up.

Like this:

Yes, it's a really outdated picture, but you don't care, do you? You're just gushing over the cuteness, aren't you?

Tune in tomorrow, when I may actually write about Miles for a change. Or not. Now that I have reliable access to a computer for a change, I can write as often as I wish, on any topic that suits my fancy.

But, you'll keep coming back, hoping for another random picture of Miles. :)

*Minus the CD drive, but really, who uses that anymore?

**Yes, we name our computers. Who doesn't?

***I can totally see that happening with my phone.

Fixing the Toys

Miles often amuses me greatly as he plays. One of the things I find most amusing is this:

Whenever he gets a toy he likes, one of the first things he does is turn it upside down. And bang on it with whatever is handy. In this particular case, he had just finished beating it with the blue ring in the bottom corner of the picture. Those rings are a favorite tool. Because that's the only thing I can imagine that he could be doing - fixing the toys.

I know, I know, it sounds ridiculous. But you haven't seen how methodical this kid is. He very carefully turns the toy over, observing any changes in how it behaves. Then, he sits back on his knees and watches it as though it might spontaneously jump back over to upright. When it doesn't, he will crawl away, and find a tool. Any sufficiently solid toy will do, so long as he can comfortably hold it in one hand. Then, the real work begins. He taps on the bottom of the toy, tentatively at first, then harder until it resounds with a certain quality of "Thwang!"

Then, he places the tool on the floor beside him, and carefully turns the toy back over. He'll press a few buttons, and before long, he's playing with the toy as it was intended to be played with. I have seen him do this with this car toy, a toy xylophone-gator, his new keyboard, and his pop-up animal toy (more about that one later this week). I have watched him, and the only conclusion I can come to is that he is fixing the toys.

Because, you know, apparently they were broken when I bought them. :)

My Favorite Picture

This is one of my favorite pictures of Miles, for a few reasons:

1) He's 'reading'. I am SO glad that this boy has an affinity for books. Often, he uses them as toys, tossing them around with wild abandon. But occasionally, like in this photo, he will sit quietly and simply page through them, as though he understands, somehow, how to use a book.

2) He's reading his Bible stories book. He is fascinated by all things related to religion. He loves to stare at the cross on his wall. Church makes him utterly happy. And his Bible stories book is the one he's most likely to be looking at on any given day.

3) He's sitting in a rocking chair that is just his size. I think child-sized furniture is absolutely adorable. Especially if it looks exactly like adult furniture, only miniaturized.

4) That particular tiny rocking chair belonged to his daddy as a small child. I love that connection that has been forged between the past and the present - as though the wheel of time has come full circle.

Bad Mommy

It's well established by now that I am a Bad Mommy. And, just in case you weren't convinced by my choice of teethers, my lack of planning skills, or the fact that I still rock my kid to sleep, I now offer you photographic evidence:

Yes, that's my child. In the dryer. And yes, that's me, laughing at it on the side.

Go ahead and flog me.

I have no defense, except to say that he was curious about it, so I put him in to explore for a moment. And boy did he explore. He banged on the drum. He stared at himself in the shiny silver thing on the back (what is that anyway?). He cooed and squealed, listening to the echoes. And, he had fun.

I know, I know, it's not a toy. And I know it could be dangerous. But I was right there the whole time (so was Patrick, obviously, since I'm in the picture). And I know that makes me a Bad Mommy.

But, hey, at least I didn't turn it on. :)

Heeerrre's Johnny (3)!

So, you know Patrick and me. You've heard me talk about Lilo. You're probably aware of the fact that we have a cat named Nikko. And of course you know all about Miles. Let me introduce you to one family member you probably haven't met, yet.

World, meet Johnny 3.

Johnny was an impulse purchase at a sale night at Bed, Bath, and Beyond a year and a half ago. He was just so cute. And smart. He can roam around on his own and not run into things!* So, we bought him, and brought him home. We loved him and played with him, and named him after the coolest 80's nerd movie robot ever. But, since there can only be one Johnny 5, and our boy only has 3 wheels, we decided on Johnny 3.

We had no end of fun chasing the dog around the apartment with it. We loved to watch him roam free. Patrick dreamed up various ways he could 'improve' our new addition.

And then, we put him on a shelf and ignored him. For a long time. He seemed doomed to the life of a toy who has no one to play with. The worst fate a toy can receive.

And then, a little blonde** miracle came along. At first, he had no interest in Johnny. But as he grew, he became more and more intrigued by the red robot who had taken up residence on top of the TV.

One day, the little Miracle's daddy took down the robot and put him on the floor. And a friendship was born.

Now, Miles and Johnny play on the floor happily together, with help from Mommy or Daddy controlling the remote.

And now, all is well in the world for a little red robot named Johnny 3 and his boy, Miles.

*Yes, that was the primary selling point.

**Possibly strawberry-blonde.