Steps have been taken

It was a desperate situation.

Samantha wanted to follow Miles, more than anything in the world.  The problem? At her fastest crawl, she was still too slow to keep up.  And it frustrated her.  She would stare at him with longing as he ran past. She would let go of the coffee table, and promptly fall on her rear.

But no more.

Now, when Brother takes off running, Sister lets go of that table and toddles after him

For about five steps before face-planting on the hardwood floors.

But, it's progress, and she is one determined little lady.  She will be off and running in no time. :)

Moment

It is 5:30 on a Monday evening, and my babies are both sleeping.

Patrick is at a welding class, and my friend who was coming for dinner had to cancel at the last minute, because work happens.

I've been sitting here for almost three hours, cuddled up with Samantha, certain she was going to wake up at any moment.  Only now, as my fingers fly across the keyboard does she wake, groggy, to chew on the strings of my hoodie and blow raspberries at me.  The room has grown dark around me, but I have no desire to switch on the light, yet.

It's twilight, and it's quiet, and it's perfect.

Two.

Some days, having two small children is overwhelming.

Scratch that.

Most days.  Everyday, to some degree.

I had just started getting used to sleeping through the night again, and now we're back to an infant who wakes at least 2-3 times a night.

I'd forgotten how expensive formula and diapers are.  And how quickly infant clothes are outgrown.

Getting out the door takes four times longer with two children than it did with one.  I'm still not clear on how that math works.

I spend a lot of my day listening to one child cry while I help the other one with basic care.  Miles needs food?  Time for Sam to start screaming.  Sam needs to eat?  Time for Miles to have a meltdown because his banana broke.  I am exhausted, mentally, physically, and emotionally. Every.day.

And then, my children do something awesome to remind me why they're worth it all.

Like when they hold hands in the car.  Every.single.time we get in it.

Or when they wrestle on the floor and laugh so hard that you can't help but laugh with them.

Or when they cuddle down for nap together.

Or when Miles admonishes Samantha: "No, Sam! That's not safe! You scared me!"

Or when Samantha takes four or five wobbling steps trying to chase after Miles.

Or when he doesn't see her and starts crying, asking, "Where my Samantha go?"

Or when she does see him and gives him a special smile that's just for him.

Having two is tough.  Tougher than I ever would have thought.  I will not lie - I have on occasion wondered what the hell we were thinking adding another child to the mix.  And then I realize.

Our family was incomplete without Samantha.

Yes, things are harder, now.  But, they're also so much better.

So much. . .

I feel like I'm bursting at the seams.

I have so many creative endeavors in my head, and no time or place to bring them to fruition.

I have so many recipes I want to try, and two small children who don't allow me the preparation time.

I have so many books I want to read.

So many shows I want to see.

So many projects around the house.

I want to do ALL THE THINGS!!!

Which is just overwhelming, and makes me stare at the wall trying to decide what to do until my children remind me that I don't have the luxury of staring at walls for long.

Projects.
Books.
Recipes.
Shows.
Writing.
Yoga.
Friends.
Sleep.

I want all of this. And so much more.

Miss Me?

It's apparently been about three months since my last post. . .

Oops.

See, we re-enacted The Money Pit bought and remodeled a house and moved in.

And my computer broke.  Again.

(Dramatic re-enactment. Photo credit: Hackaday)

Thanksgiving happened.  And then, Christmas happened.

(Photo credit: Flikr)

And then there's always these two:

Hopefully, the new year will bring more opportunities to share our lives with all of you!