Monday, May 16, 2011

Bad Mommy Mondays

Yes, I think it's time to return to this again.  I will probably trade off between this and Lessons of Mommyhood, as each strikes my fancy. :)

This week, however, I am going to focus a bit on reasons I have felt like a Bad Mommy.  Yes, I realize that I'm not, but I feel like one sometimes.  I think every mommy does.  Sorry, but this probably won't be funny.
  1. I love and adore my child all the time, more than I could ever say.  There are days, however, that I just can't handle him, and want to be away from him.  It's practical, but I don't like that I feel it.  Plus, leaving him is the leading cause of panic attacks.
  2. I do not spend hours every day playing with my son.  As much as I love playing and interacting with him, he doesn't need my undivided attention all day, and I run out of things to do with him.
  3. I cannot stand to listen to him scream.  It is one of the biggest triggers for my panic attacks.  So, I respond in one of two ways: I either give in to whatever he wants so it will stop, or I stick my fingers in my ears in an effort to block it out, while Patrick deals with it.  I am getting better in this arena, but it's still a struggle not to just give him whatever he wants.
  4. I'm not particular about what I feed my kid.  As long as he eats it, and it doesn't make him sick, I usually let him have it.  I feel like I should be more concerned about his eating habits.
  5. I am overwhelmed by Miles.  Even with almost 20 months of practice, and with the help of family, friends, and medication, I am utterly overwhelmed by my child most days.

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