Tuesday, May 10, 2011

"Don't Eat That!" is my new mantra

Stuff my son has eaten recently: 
  • Play-doh
  • Dog food
  • Cat food
  • Paper
  • Half of a playing card
  • Stickers (undetermined number)
  • Kleenex (unused)
  • Napkins (at a restaurant)
  • The corner of a board book
  • A little yellow flower from the yard
Stuff my son has stuck in his mouth recently:
  • Every damn rock we see
  • My deodorant
  • Golf balls (plastic)
  • Dog toys
  • Books
  • My pants (while I'm wearing them)
  • My shirt sleeve (while I'm wearing it)
  • My hair
  • The dog's ear
  • Various and sundry stuffed animal bits
  • Socks
  • Coins of every denomination.  I'm pretty sure he even tried to eat a Mexican peso the other day.
Stuff my son has licked* recently:
  • Every floor he sees regularly
  • Most flat surfaces in our home
  • Several flat surfaces in other peoples' homes
  • Random restaurant tables
  • Windows
  • Doors
  • Multiple televisions (not all ours)
  • Random furniture
  • People's legs
  • My feet
  • My cell phone
  • My laptop
  • The couch
  • Lots of rocks
  • The sidewalk
  • The playground equipment
  • My pillow
  • The baby gate
  • The soap dispenser in the bathroom
  • The outside of the peanut butter jar
Stuff my child has refused to eat/stick in his mouth recently:
  • Crackers
  • Cereal
  • Chicken
  • Rice
  • Sweet potatoes
  • Milk
  • Green beans
  • Bread (though, he did lick the peanut butter off of it. . .)
  • Beans
  • Macaroni
  • Pancakes
  • Apples
  • Various other actual foods that would provide him sustenance

*Seriously?  Who goes around licking things?  Weirdo. :)

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