Monday, July 25, 2011

Bad Mommy Mondays

Instead of a list today, I have a story for you.

The setting: the Festival office, after hours; completely empty save for:

The cast: Maestro, Tobar, Karla, Miles, Me

As our story opens, Mommy is leaving the bathroom.  Miles tries to re-direct her outside, but she returns to her office to finish up a few things.


Miles throws himself dramatically on the floor, and begins a temper tantrum of Epic Proportions.  Mommy walks back to her office anyway, leaving the screaming child in the hall.


Maestro: What's wrong?
Mommy: Nothing, he just wants to go outside, and I said no.

Work-related conversation continues for several minutes, while screaming continues in the background.  Occasionally, conversation pauses long enough for everyone to listen and giggle quietly at the fact that this ridiculously dramatic child just won't let up.


Maestro: [putting his finger to his lips] Shhh. [He picks up a chair] No, no!  Don't do it!  Don't hurt the Mommy! [slams chair on floor, then grins, waiting for a reaction]

Miles: [continues screaming and crying, seeming to not even notice the theatrics]

A few more moments pass, with the screaming beginning to fade slightly as Miles winds down.  Just when it seems to be over, the screaming intensifies ten-fold, now worse than before.


Maestro: [whispering] Tobar, go slam the back door. [grinning mischievously]

Tobar stomps across the floor toward the back door.  Screaming begins to fade a little.


Maestro: Bye!  See you tomorrow!
Mommy: Bye!  Have a great evening!

Right on cue, the door slams.  A moment of utter silence, then


Miles: Mom-mom-mom-mom-mom-mom-mom!!!!! [He rounds the corner to find everyone - including Mommy - laughing hysterically.  He looks around, momentarily confused, then smiles uncertainly.] Ha?  Ha ha ha? Ha ha?

The laughter increases exponentially, and Miles joins in wholeheartedly, still not fully understanding.


End Scene

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